I NEED TO LET OUT MY SADNESS BADLY. KINDLY SKIP THIS POST.

it's time to open up to all. i'am not strong anymore to keep it deep inside and pretend that
ntg happen. maybe for you ntg happen,but to me no. All this while i kept holding on to our relationship because i believe in the word compromise. Every second you ignored me i still
believe that we could end up back together. But i think that hope no longer exist. What
i know now that i tried my very best. I kept my own sadness and feelings aside. So
that i wont be label a protective/jealous gf.
But i guess you took it for granted. Its totally true that you know everything about me.
and that includes my weakness,which you eventually took advantage of it. I've always
have this fairytale about you and me going on. But now,maybe it wont even happen.

I've always believe that you would be the last person to hurt me. But after all, no.
I dont know whats up with us,we have nothing to argue about but yet,we're going
through all this pain. or maybe, its just me who's going through this pain. If i knew that
today would happen,i wouldnt have even gave you many many chances to change.
Chances of us to be like who we used to be. I;m positive all this happen for a reason. But
all this while i blinded myself. kept telling myself this is just fr awhile. just a moment of
nightmare. i want this to end but if you dont want this to end,then i dont know what im
supposed to do anymore.i've done everything i could. i cry i try to smile when
im sad and i still try to be nice to you even after the way you treated me.
at a point of time,you gave me all those empty promises,then come again,think of it,would
you even care to do allthe promises. i do not believe in "promises are meant to be broken"
Indeed,i'll miss you tons when im gone.

I kept myself busy to keep you off my mind,but at the end of the day,you're still there.
right there waiting to make a huge frown on my face. I am very very much tired of this lil'
game which i know at the end of the day,its going nowhere. i dont know what im typing.
dear Allah, please give me as much strength to face all thissssssss.
2009,you've not been a good year for me.

i need a rest.

"the more friends you have, the more enemies you would have too. so just stick to those that you have now cause they're somehow special and would always stick with you"